qualitiesamystory

safety

qualitiesamystory

safety makes lists. they are lists about improbable but possible scenarios and what to do and take in case of each. they are lists about foods, and equipment and the best and worst places to visit. there are list for almost every place, activity and idea you can think of. safety like short phrases like "stop,drop, and roll", "head for the hills", "chop off it's head",  "duck and cover" and "fear is excitement without breath".

it is difficult to take a walk with safety for he is always pointing out tripping hazards and reminding you to look both ways and stay on the path and not to touch that. (sometimes i do it just to spite him but then i end up with stingy nettles and a lecture.)

safety dreams of warm places with adequate shade and a breeze. he dreams of places free from earthquakes, tsunami's, and predators, with clean drinking water and plenty of food. New Zealand came close but has far too many fault lines and much, too much coast line-other than that is was sublimely perfect. he is still hunting for the ideal place and is currently investigating the area around Corvallis Oregon.

safety would wrap everyone and himself in layers of bubble wrap or toilet paper much like those Charmin commercials that show little kids stuffing their seats full of squeezably soft Charmin to go ice skate. depending on where you live, safety might want to wrap you in kevlar but that thought just makes him sad.

safety carries a first aide kit, extra water, a flash light and matches, compass, and a swiss army knife everywhere. he also has enough dehydrated food for 3 days.

safety is the best pet sitter and will look after your animals and belongings until you return. safety will also send out little prayers of safe travels, return and exploration.

it's not that safety never takes a risk, it's just he chooses to make informed risks. while this may take the fun out or risk for some people, safety got to be safety because of his dangerous and disastrous youth.

safety has worked in construction, in transportation, for the government and as an actor who played a British professor of history. he currently consults artist and authors and film directors working notably on surviving crazy situations like being crushed and hacking your arm off,  cougar attacks, extracting bee stingers, and how to survive the zombie apocalypse or aliens.

safety will always be here to welcome you with open arms and remind you how home feels. or how home should feel.

safety isn't anywhere, he has left his mark everywhere-you've only to call out and he will find you.

safety always, always knows what you need. if only you would just ask.